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  • Tom Boyd

My Obituary

When in 2013 I thought that I would not see 2014 I started drafting my own obituary. An obituary is a news article that reports the recent death of a person, typically along with an account of the person’s life and information about the upcoming funeral.

The local newspapers now call them “Life Tribute” and In Memoriam Notices” and charges for them by the line with extra charges for the picture. I have been astonished at the length of some of these postings, the number of times they appear and often the use of a color picture taken many years before. I do not understand why anyone, likely including my kids, would spend $3,000 and more for newspaper ads with limited appeal. Of course, at that time it will be my money they are spending and I can’t take it with me. I would rather they feed the homeless than feed the local newspapers.

Rather than a flowery and exaggerated tribute that would produce a yawn, chuckle or “really?” I would ask my kids that they treat their Mother better, visit her more often and do things for her that she does not have the skills or strength to accomplish.

Here is the obituary I drafted; short and to the point and with no picture. And should cost less than $100 for one appearance.

“Thomas E. Boyd DOB 9/8/48, DOD XX/XX/XXXX, son of Ingeborg and Robert Boyd, wife Nancy, kids Aaron, Cindy, Colin, grandkids Marisa, Tera, Connor, all Boyd’s. Brother Bernie Gregor. Looking forward to seeing granddaughter Lorelei Lea.”

Frugal to the end.

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